How to build confidence so you can plan to quit your 9–5.

Fabe Mitchell
8 min readNov 4, 2021

A discussion on what is hurting your confidence, how to build your confidence, and what to guard your confidence against. All, so you can take better control of your life

Why is my Confidence so low?

When it comes to your confidence, what you feel determines your daily actions. And more than you may realize your confidence levels are a key motivating factor in aiding you in quitting your job.

Let me know if this is you.

You have been attempting to build a business for some time. Yet it almost seems like you are cursed from being successful. That all your efforts seem for not over the past couple of years. You are certain your idea is good. So much so, you have made some money. Maybe not life-changing money, but enough to validate the business and some extra motivation to keep pushing forward. Except, you feel stuck in the business right now. You’re no closer today than you were 6 months ago from leaving your job. This “curse” is hanging over you like a cloud blocking the warmth of a successful sun.

A major reason you may feel stuck is that your confidence is low. Let’s go a little deeper into why that may be.

Even though you have been working on the business, there are still different levels of growth. Each level presents new challenges that are unknown to you. It is normal to not have full confidence in areas you aren’t experienced in. It’s just at the next level there may be discomfort because you may have to step way outside of your zone of genius.

With that being said, because you aren’t comfortable reaching that next rung on the ladder, you may get in your own way and hold yourself back. Thus making the goal of quitting your job seem more impossible, and compounding the belief that you are cursed.

I have listened to the book Prosperity Consciousness by Fred Leherman. In it, he talked about whatever you think about expands. So, if you think you are cursed, or any other negative thought, it will make that an actual reality. Even more, these thoughts that are deep will add up to drive your confidence low. And at that point, you are walking around with low confidence because you’re not challenging yourself to get unstuck.

What is the best way to build your confidence?

We will be using the VICE methodology on how you can build your confidence. VICE is what I described as the 4 levels of self-mastery. They stand for Vision, Information, Communication, and Effort.

Going back to our example, if you are feeling cursed in your business, then first understand where this feeling is coming from. Maybe you feel cursed because you have degrees, and experience in your field. And with all of this prestigious paperwork, you feel your business should be in a much better place than it is. Thus, you have quite the confusion on why your business isn’t moving in the direction you want it to.

Now, the path to building confidence so that you can take the leap and go full-time in your business does not have to be hard. The best way to build your confidence is to focus on self-mastery. By doing this, you not only better understand yourself, as a by-product your business grows even further. Working through the levels will award you with insight into what is causing the low confidence levels.

Here’s how to build confidence to quit your job:

Continuing with the thought that you are cursed, we will start working through vision. As you sit back and begin to think about where this cursed mentality comes from, you begin to realize that your expectations may not be aligned. You assume that because you have 3 degrees, experience, and graduated from a prestigious college that everything would come easy to you.

Except it hasn’t.

The few jobs you’ve had over the years have paid you little as well. So, you discover within yourself that you really don’t believe you can leave your job. And since you feel this way, you can’t imagine it. You never thought about your business further than something you do in your spare time. Even though you want to quit your job.

Without a belief that you can achieve something, the vision does not seem possible. Lacking a vision of this possibility deters the amount of effort you may put out to make it happen. Therefore, this deep-rooted belief of the impossible shades everything that you are doing for the business.

Simply put, craft a vision and put the plan together to leave your job. Even if you have benefits with your job, you can find resources online where you can find insurance, 401K, etc. Once you understand how you can get benefits as an entrepreneur through your business, then you can start working on the right income levels you need.

When the vision is clear of the income you need, your benefits, and the income you want in your business, a little bit of confidence will grow. Because the impossible became possible by having clarity on the process. Next, with this vision of how you can make the transition from your 9–5 to full-time, you only need the information required to make your vision a reality. Meaning after you went deep to understand why your confidence is low, and you have the vision to address it, what information or knowledge do you need to make that happen.

More specifically, if the fear of losing benefits is one of the items that cause you not to want to leave a steady paying job, then do research on how you can obtain benefits as a self-employed person. You have a benefit by still being employed. You can figure out how much all of these benefits will cost you, and have your prices for your services reflect these expenses. With the knowledge you learn on business expenses you can afford you will build more confidence.

The communication stage is where you bring others in on the process. Your family may be your biggest supporters or some of the negative weight holding you down. Even if they are negative, this may come from a place of love. They may not want to see you fail. This comes from a place of lacking a vision on how you will quit your job as well. Since you have confidently built a vision for quitting your job, and you have the resources and information you need for it, now communicate that with your family.

Hopefully, with the same clarity you have on how you will make it happen, your family will begin to see the picture come into focus as well.

Lastly, quite frankly, you have to put in the effort if you want to quit your job. This is where many people fail but they won’t admit it. Effort is the proverbial final piece of the business building puzzle. Everything will be made possible if you decide to take daily(yes daily) action towards leaving your 9–5.

We are in an age where you can learn anything, anyway, at any time. Working through the levels of self-mastery can grant you the opportunity to plan out how you can keep things moving forward in a confident manner that aligns with you.

What are 3 ways to boost your confidence fast?

  1. The first way that I explain this may surprise you. Yet, it is the most powerful way that will help you build confidence and grant you the happiness of working towards your goals. I actually learned this from Email Marketing Supremacist Ben Settle.

He has a print newsletter that he sends every month that has different topics on email marketing, copywriting or business building. It is called Email Players and in one issue he gave this idea and I started to run with it. In it he talked about nobody else getting you, your time or energy before you work on your own business.

This may seem selfish to you at first right.

Well, let’s talk about it.

If you wake up early and dedicate an hour a day to your business before anything else, then you will keep the needle moving forward in your business.

And what would help guard against is anger and resentment. See, all too often we spend our days focusing our energy on everybody else’s desires. Which then shoves our own to the back burner. So after you spent an entire day pleasing your bosses, pleasing your spouse, and pleasing friends or family you feel too tired and unenergetic to work on your business.

And that is where resentment and guilt start to set in. I am not talking about some 5 AM copy a millionaire habit here that you hear all the time. I’m saying with intention, with desire, and confidence you put yourself first.

You’ll find that you will be accomplishing things at your peak performance and this will build on itself over time creating bigger and bigger confidence and you do more in your business daily.

2. Guard your mental health against social media. In fact, fuck social media while growing your business every day. To build confidence quickly avoid as much as possible consuming social media.

I didn’t say you can’t create, but avoid the scroll and consume as little as possible. Much of what you see on social media isn’t all that it seems. And we humans unfortunately have the knack for comparing ourselves to our peers.

We see someone getting engagement — we check out our own engagement and wonder why we aren’t there. Somebody has grown a large following — we check our followers and wonder why we aren’t getting more. People are blasting with all these clients they are getting — we then wonder where our ideal clients are.

The point is your confidence takes a hit daily because your focus is on others' path and not your own. Simply eliminate the consumption of social media as much as you can and watch your mental health and confidence spike because of it.

3. Last way to quickly gain confidence is to find an online mentor that you trust to learn from. I am not just saying me(while that would be nice), but you have to find someone who aligns with your ideals.

Why is this important to growing your confidence quickly? Because oftentimes what happens online is you jump from business source to business source.

And what this does is keep you in a perpetual state of learning with barely any doing. But when you find somebody you can trust well, you are more likely to consume, learn, and actually implement their teachings.

You may be asking, how do I find someone online trustworthy to learn from? Great question.

Here are some things to consider:

  • Do they show up every day, no matter what, providing educational, entertaining knowledge that helps you on the path you desire.
  • Do they do in their business the things they are teaching
  • If they only talk about you making 6 figures a year or income period, run. They are trying to consistently sell you a dream and their paid content will be regurgitated crap. They make 6 figures on selling that dream.
  • Do they share their mistakes in a genuine way to help you avoid the same. Even high-level mentors/coaches make mistakes, and sharing them with their tribe shows genuine care to be transparent.
  • I mentioned if they focus on income only, to run, I will mention it again because it’s that important. While revenue is the goal of business, that will come if you focus on serving people. So their goal should be trying to deepen the relationship with you in any type of way.

In times like we have now it isn’t hard to see why confidence may be hard to come by. Yet I believe it is possible to gain more of it no matter your current situation in life.

If you’re ready to gain the tools, insight, and confidence to build a sustainable, profitable business that helps you leave that 9–5, then join the daily Active Entrepreneur Newsletter.

Inside the newsletter, you will learn how to build a sustainable business, and how you can begin to build a business that isn’t dependent on social media. In fact, you learn how you can protect your business from big tech and cancel culture.

Here are the details: archive.berserkermail.com/selfeducatedentrepreneur

As always, I appreciate you for reading.

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Fabe Mitchell

Write about marketing, business, & self improvement alongside your 9-5. www.fabemitchell.com